EP85 - Do You Own Your Business, Or Does It Own You?
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[00:00:00] Hello, hello, and welcome to the Big-Hearted podcast. My name is Victoria Edmond, and I am your host. Our aim here at the Big-Hearted Podcast is to nurture a community of heart-centered educators to change the perception and delivery of early childhood education and care in Australia, and ultimately around the world.
We want you to be inspired by our guests and the topics we bring to you to think of new ways of being As an educator, we want you to feel a sense of belonging via this podcast so that you can engage any time of the day or night in any place that suits you. We want you to become an educator that delivers education from the heart, as we believe this is how we create great change within our world.
So join us as we discover new ways to inspire each other here. On the big hearted podcast.
Hello, [00:01:00] hello and welcome back to the podcast. She's back. Y Gal is back. It has been a hot minute and it's not because I haven't wanted to record a podcast. It's just been so freaking hectic. Uh, we've had the summit. This will had a launch, which was interrupted by a cyclone Alfred, and then we had a summit, and then we had a conference and it was just all.
Like happening all at once and it's been busy, my friends. So, uh, I'm back in the hot seat and I've had so many messages over the last couple of months of people going, where's the podcast back? Um, I really want you to cover this topic in that topic and, uh, yeah, I've been noting them all down. Don't you worry, my friends....
so this week I really want to talk about, um. As the topic of the, or the title of the podcast suggests, do you own your business or does it own you? So I really want to look [00:02:00] into that and really bring you along on that journey because it's taken me a real, uh, long time to actually get that balance fairly right in my business.
And sometimes, you know, there's so many balls in the air that something has to give and. I don't know about you, but quite often my default strategy is to go into busyness and create a whole lot of stress in order for me to feel like I'm managing and in control of things, which is a total furphy because when I get into that default mode, it means that I'm already overwhelmed and it.
Absolutely does not work. All it does is serve to make me sleep badly and make silly decisions and eat lots of chocolate. So I really wanna talk about this with you because, uh, it's taken me a long time to be able to get to the point where I can recognize those signs a lot earlier and put things in place to circumvent that.
So the feelings that I get [00:03:00] is that I'm always on, like I can't. Ever switch off. I can't ever like stop thinking about all of the things that I have to do, and my to-do list is just forever growing and there's just no time where I can switch off. So like you, I work from my home office, and so when I walk out of my office.
I literally walk into my laundry and then my kitchen. So I'm constantly just seeing all these jobs that I've gotta do, and I just feel like, um, that there's just never any off time. There's never any downtime, there's never time where I. When I'm in that zone, when I can actually like sit down and drink a cup of tea and thoroughly enjoy it without feeling like I'm letting somebody down.
And that's a huge burden to, to hold and to bear. And let me tell you, friends, we are not [00:04:00] designed for that. Life is not meant to be like that. Home is meant to be your sanctuary. So there's things that you have to do as a business owner. To put boundaries in place so that you can protect that sanctum, that inner sanctum of your home as your home.
And for some of you, your family daycare setup is in your lounge room. So it's even harder to create those boundaries and those lines between when you are working and when you are not working. So I would really encourage you to find a place where you can. You know, you might have to sacrifice your dining room or like, when I ran family daycare from here, it was in my current office, which was a garage that had been converted into a bedroom way before we moved into the house.
Uh, but uh, it was separate enough that I could like, walk away from this room and it wasn't in the middle of our house, [00:05:00] so to speak. But if you are in that situation where. Your environment is a hundred percent in the middle of your house. I would be looking at being able to maybe put a nice decorative sheet over your rows and bookshelves of toys and resources and things like that, just so that it comes into that bit of a zen zone.
And when you put that on. It's like closing the door to your office, so to speak. And for some of you, it's gonna actually be okay because you have your own little ones at home anyway, so it's, it's fine. It's a no brainer. It's how your life would be anyway. Uh, and, and obviously that's going to be up to you and your family situation as well, but I would really encourage you to put some boundaries in place that really signify Okay, I finished work for the day.
Um, so. I know that it's hard to clock off, um, because work is always right there, but there is [00:06:00] something that you can do. There can be a kind of ritual that you do. Uh, I used to wear aprons, so when I would take my apron off, it was like, right. That's the end of my day. So the families would leave by 5:00 PM and I would go around and do my final sweep and my final mop, spot mop, and I would, the children and I would have packed away all of the resources before the last one left.
So that was always done in my work hours. And then it was just those final little bits and pieces maybe I wanted. To set something up for the next day or have that organized or pulled the next day's craft out and put that on my bench so that it was ready to go and I didn't have to stress in the morning.
And then once I took my apron off, that for me was that signal that my work, my official workday had finished and I was then, uh, with my family and quite often it was. Literally running out the door to netball training or something. Anyway, [00:07:00] so for me it was about, you know, that that ritual of taking my apron off was the signal for my mental state that, okay, I've switched into mum mode now.
Um, so I, I wanna talk about you being the boss or the employee cleaner Cook. Admin. So as solo educators, you take pride in being everything in your service, but that can also be really exhausting. So one of the things that we did was we. Decided, and it was a rule that I had even before I came into family daycare, that if I was working more than, you know, two or three days a week, that I had a cleaner come in because I did not want to spend, I.
All of my free time or any of my free time really at all cleaning. Uh, I did enough of that in my workplace when I was, uh, working on the floor as an educator in [00:08:00] a long daycare setting. And I also did enough of that, uh, whilst working from my own home as a family daycare educator. So every Friday I had a cleaner come in so that I could.
Start my weekend like completely ready. All I had to do was my washing and meal prep for the week ahead, and that felt so much more manageable. It also felt bougie as to have a cleaner come in every week and do things in my home for me. And it was the first job that I was totally ready to let go of. Now, you may not be in a position to be able to do that, but I certainly was and I prioritized that.
I would rather work an hour and a bit in my family daycare and pay her for two hours of cleaning. Then have that time in my own time to myself or to my family. So I sacrificed whatever I needed to sacrifice in order to make that happen. So if that helps you, I think it's one of the best [00:09:00] things that you can do.
Plus you can also get your cleaner to give you an invoice, uh, and claim it as a business expense. Just make sure she cleans your, your play space. And, uh, most cleaners, they won't care where they make it out to. Um. You know, whether it be you or your business. And, uh, it's a, it's a tax write off for you and it it is like they're literally coming in and cleaning your space and doing a deep clean every week, which is a really good and positive thing in your business as well.
I. So I would like to ask you if your days are feeling like they're empowering you or if they're depleting you. So we have to really look at what's actually at play and what's working in your business. So part of being a business owner means choosing how your days run, not just surviving them. So do your hours, honor your energy and your family rhythms.
Uh, is there enough space for your family? Are, are you putting your work in [00:10:00] front of your family? And I would really encourage you to look at how that works for in your family if you are constantly spending time trying to catch up on documentation outside of your work hours. I. Cleaning outside of your work hours, um, getting prepared and ready for the next day or the next week outside of your work hours.
I would like to put to you that there are some fundamental imbalances within your business there, and we really need to look at those and make sure that you are addressing that and really looking at your time management. Now, it may be difficult to hear. But if you are doing all of those outside of your work hours, you are not managing your work hours well enough.
All of that work could and should be done within your work hours, with the exception of. Planning. So if you batch plan, and I will talk about this until the cows come [00:11:00] home. Uh, and I know there's a lot of resistance to educators wanting to plan in advance the way I teach. I understand. I totally get it.
But I ask you if it's working for you, not doing it. And I would suggest that committing to at least two to three seasons of planning goals in advance to really get your head around it and really get into. That idea of how it can save you so much time and mental space and capacity, I really think it's worthwhile giving that a shot because if what you're doing is currently not working, it's time to do something different.
So I, I would really suggest that all of those things. Could and should be done within your work hours. And I know there are some schools of thought that say educators shouldn't be doing those things while they're caring and looking after the children, but I absolutely, fundamentally disagree with that school of [00:12:00] thought and truly believe that children.
Find it a privilege to be a part of those processes. So why not slow your day down enough where if you think, you know what, my windows are all looking a little bit grubby, I'm going to get the children who put the grubby marks on that to help me clean those windows. Yes, you might have to go over it and finish it once the children are done.
It doesn't matter, but they've been included in that process. They get to contribute to the environment that they spend their time in, which is all positive benefits for the children. These are life long skills that you are teaching the children, but you are also doing your work and the things you need to keep your workspace in a beautiful, pristine.
Um, manner, which is what we really need to be looking towards because when we are looking at professionalism. Like I've been to [00:13:00] places where I've like walked to the front door and there's shoe piles of shoes at the front door. I came into this entryway and you could see that the walls had not been cleaned.
They were brown and grubby the whole way along that that walkway into the living space, which was cluttered. And I just, I, I spent less than five minutes there and turned around and walked down. So you're not the educator for me. I, I like children, deserve to have beautifully clean and loved environments to work in during the day, and you deserve that as well.
It, it's part of that process of being a responsible educator. So that if the department shows up that it is beautifully presented. I'm not saying it should be, you know, white. Obviously during the day, the children are going to TRAs things in and out and resources are going to be everywhere at some point.
It's a well lived in environment. It is a home, but [00:14:00] there is a certain level of. Cleanliness and professionalism, that should be evident in your environment as well. So these things should absolutely be done in your work hours, and if you're doing it outside of your work hours, yeah, we need to look at that sister.
And, uh, you are allowed to do things in your work time. Um, are you setting the tone for the day? Are you in charge of what's happening? Or are you just living on a wing and a prayer and hoping that things will flow and function? Because that's not a fun way to run your service. It also means that you are being dictated to, rather than holding the space in your business and being able to look at what's working and what's not working, and be able to make adjustments to suit.
So this is the power of owning your business. You make those decisions, you get to really reflect on what's happening for you. And ensure that things are put in place that [00:15:00] work for you, not having fun, being cooped up inside, go on an excursion or get outside, make a project outside, like whatever it is, you get to decide to do that.
And also you also get to decide the rhythm of the day. So if you really value true and proper child-led experiences where you get out of the way. And the children lead that play and lead what they're doing for the, for that day, then you can do that. You can totally facilitate that. And whilst they're busy doing that thing, sure hang your load of washing out while you are, you know, supervising the children.
This is a worthy task. It is a task that the children can assist you with. You can provide them with a little basket to hang all the face washers out, or hang and peg all the socks up. They're pairing things together. They're doing all these fine motor skills. They're looking after their [00:16:00] resources and the things that they use on the daily basis.
Uh, and, and these are skills that you can give to the children. They, this is ticking so many boxes, including ensuring that you have a good work life balance as well. So these are things to certainly consider, um, and boundaries as a form of leadership. Like I just cannot express this any more than I already am and I already do.
Simple boundary settings can transform how your business feels. So define your opening hours and stick to them if you've got parents that are pushing that envelope. Don't take it personally, don't take it personally. Maybe you just need to suggest to them that I can't open any earlier than 7:00 AM and I cannot close any later than 4:00 PM If you need time outside of those hours on a regular basis, unfortunately I'm not going to be the educator for you and assist them to find somewhere else to go to.[00:17:00]
Uh, or just. Be really upfront and really clear from the very beginning that this isn't something that you can facilitate at all. So create those physical cues like, like we talked about before, I used to take my apron off. You might shut your playroom door. You might put your pretty um. Cloths over your bookshelves or whatever it is that you do.
Maybe you go for a walk around your block, uh, at the end of every day, whatever it is that you do. But having those physical cues will be really significant and helpful for you, for your brain to go, okay, work is done for the day, and switch off. And don't do anything outside of those hours. And really notice if you are feeling the pull to do more things and go, oh, you know, all week I've not got my programming done.
I've not got my observations and reflections done. What's happened this week that's made me, oh, okay. Instead of like doing my work in my work hours, I chose to scroll. Well, now why [00:18:00] was I doing that? Why did I eyes feeling a bit overstimulated and overwhelmed? That new baby that I'm trying to settle in, or that new child that I'm trying to settle in is really taking its toll on me and I, I am.
Felt like I was regulating my nervous system by having a bit of a doom scroll. Okay, so now I need to look at that res, um, that self-discipline and go, is that the best way to regulate my nervous system? Maybe I could spend 10 minutes in between my sleep checks, doing some breathing exercises instead.
That might help me to regulate my nervous system a lot quicker, which means then I can go back and use the rest of that rest time to do my cleaning of my bathroom and toilet and spot mopping through the house and then sitting down and getting my documentation done. Once I've done that and all of those other tasks.
Are done, then I can scroll as much as my heart is content whilst doing my 10 minute sleep check still. But having that self-discipline is really going to be [00:19:00] something that assists you to make sure that you are protecting your outside of work hours. So, so build in that rest. Build in rest and real breaks.
Even if it's a cup of tea in the sun, you could pardon me. You can still do that. And it is important. You are an educator working solo all day by yourself. Prioritizing having a break. And, and I had a really lovely chair that used to sit in my bay window, and I would put my feet up and then I would sit in there.
This was before those 10 minute checks were required, so it was a little bit better and easier, but maybe you can set yourself up or change your sleep room or whatever it is, so that you can. Really prioritize those, those breaks that you need to have during the day. And it absolutely is okay to say to children, you don't have to sleep, but you must rest.
And there is no talking when you rest. Because Tori needs to have some quiet time. Some time where there's nobody asking me questions [00:20:00] because I can get overstimulated, and I just really need to prioritize that rest during the day so that I can give to you for the afternoon session. So really prioritize those breaks and, and protect them because you are worth protecting them for.
And having systems for sanity like this is so important. I'm such a systems orientated person. I love my system. And then I, I remember like when my children were, were home, uh, and I was doing family daycare, I'd be like, oh my goodness, I can't wait for the school holidays to come. I just need a little bit of a break and a little bit of a, you know, not so structured in my time.
And then by the end of the second week, I was like. Get them back to school. I really want that structure back. I really, really need that structure back because I felt like things were completely out of my control when I wasn't following my structure. So it's, it's, I talk [00:21:00] about it in the essential elements, the in breathing and the out breathing.
So during the school term would be in breathing for me, where I had to be really disciplined in what I did and how I did it and why I did it. And then I would have that outbreath for a week or two. Before I was so ready to breathe back in again and get those systems back in place because it helped my sanity.
So I really think these are some simple things that you can do to help yourself, uh, meal prep, like shop, have a menu, know what you're going to do. And cook and make sure you have those ingredients there so that you, if you know Wednesday's a really hectic day for you and you've got the two babies, and by the end of that day you are just cooked mentally well, guess what?
Make sure you have a simple dinner. Like a simple taco night or whatever it is that's simple for you. Uh, that might be expensive for some people. Uh, I don't know. But whatever it is, you might have a leftovers night, uh, whatever it is, but [00:22:00] know that you can look at your week and plan your meals accordingly so that it's going to be simple for you to roll out and you're going to have the ingredients there.
There's, I have meal prep, like shopped to a menu for as long as I can remember now. And I can't, I, I, I don't know how I did it beforehand. I don't, and I don't understand how people go shopping. Like this is making me sound really anal. And I suppose I probably am a little bit, but I don't understand how people go shopping and just put random stuff in their shopping trolley, come home, pack it away, and then the next.
Day, open their fridge and go, oh, what are we gonna cook for dinner tonight? Oh, I could make this. And, oh, but I don't have that. No, I can't make that now. So, oh, I could make this. Oh, but I'm, I'm missing that, like, that would do my heading the mental load that it would take me to figure out what I was gonna do.
Without knowing, just, just know. It's a straight up [00:23:00] no for me. And so I, I highly recommend that you meal prep and you have a menu so that you know what you're doing and when you're doing it and how you're doing it, and you don't have to think about it. And, and two, if you've got teenagers, you can give them that job.
You can cook tacos tonight or you can make spaghetti bolognese or you can make a soup or whatever it is, uh, or do what I used to do, particularly in winter. I would put the slow cooker on, so I would have some before school care children with me, and we would put the slow cooker on. And they would help me cook it and then they'd get a little taste of it in the afternoon, um, before they went home.
And, uh, it worked, worked. And then all day the slow cooker was on and I didn't have to worry about it. We used to, we have a fireplace in our house too, so we would often make soup on the fireplace during the day with the kindy children, and they'd have a small bowl of it in the afternoon. Um, for afternoon tea, it's.
Hearty and warming and rich [00:24:00] and gets the children to try all these different things. It became part of our program and then dinner was done as well. So, you know, there's just so many different ways that you can make your life easier. Um, I love a visual planner. I love being able to write the things down.
Someone asked me the other day, or asked on the web on one of the Facebook pages. About making our program, our planner, a digital product. I've looked at it, it's gonna cost me about 50 grand to do it. So it's a bit out of my price range at this point. But also the research says that when we write things down, I.
It sticks in us more. It, it connects to our brain and, and it's easier to stick to if we write things down rather than put things in digital. So I'm a massive fan of having a, um, a planner and having things in place. If you are. Watching on YouTube at some point, I'm holding up my yearly calendar because I put a calendar in place at [00:25:00] the beginning of every year, including putting when I'm launching programs and having breaks, and when I go visit my team, I live by this piece of paper and.
We then transfer it. Once I've got it all on there, we then transfer it into our Google calendar. But these things are built in and they are there for a purpose, and it just saves so much mental capacity when I can easily say yes to something or as equally say no to something. Or if I wanna say yes and there's something already planned, I can look to see if I can move that or adjust my plans to make that be able to happen.
Uh, so it, it's certainly, uh, so much easier, uh, for me to live a life like that. Uh, and then like creating templates. With things like if you use Canva, if you don't use Canva yet, get on there friend. It is so much simpler because you don't have to [00:26:00] recreate the wheel every single time you go to do things.
So these are systems that you can create that will give you more brain space back it. Yes. It takes a little bit of time. To set things up, like it takes me about 20 minutes to, to write my menu and meal plan for the week. Uh, that's the same thing to write my meal plan and my shopping list for the week takes me about 20 minutes.
Uh, and then I just go and do the shopping. So that 20 minutes, I bet you more than any money you would spend more than 20 minutes during the week going, what am I gonna cook? I need to gather all these things. And, oh, I don't have that. I gotta send hubby to the shop. Can you get this on the way home? La la, la la.
So you save time in the long run. Excuse me. You might hear I'm still not a hundred percent. Well, um, but the other thing too is that you're not alone. Community doesn't mean you have to all be in the same room at the same time. It is about. Leaning on your community in an online [00:27:00] perspective because we are really blessed to be able to do that.
Um, and encourage, I I encourage you to reach out to fellow family day educators, um, and attend virtual workshops or in person, um, events like we just had recently the Dream Lead Play Conference, which was so fantastic, uh, in this week's big mouth. Um, newsletter. There is some pictures in there, so if you haven't seen that, make sure you, um, get yourself a copy.
Let me know if you're not on that list and I'll send it to you. Um, but you know, it's, it's certainly, um, exciting when we all get together. And, and there, when you get together in person, you can make those online connections as well. And it just solidifies those relationships that we have. Um, so if, if you're feeling like you're a little bit on your Pat Malone, maybe you can be the person that creates some change around that, and you can look at creating a reflection, circle yourself, gather some educators, and create [00:28:00] a group chat and, and really just.
Work together that way so that if you need to have a vent, you can get on there and have a little vent, but also if you're having some wins, you can get in there and share those wins. So I would really like you to, to look at if you are missing any of those things. Is your business really running you? Are you like, is your business dictating to you the hours that you spend in it or are you taking the bull by the horn and really making some, um, sacrifices and some decisions that help you?
To be able to be more in control, to set those boundaries and to have those, uh, things that work for you instead of you working for them. So what's one small change that you can make this week moving forward? What's one thing that you can commit? To for your own sanity, uh, and I'd love to hear about that.
Maybe you can leave [00:29:00] me a comment and, uh, let me know what it is that you're going to do. So next week I am going to talk about, uh, starting your family daycare because I've had a number of requests for people, um, on what to start. Uh, or what you need to put in place to start your family daycare. So stay tuned for that episode.
I very much appreciate your time. Uh, I hope you got some out of this. And I really love when people say to me, can you do a, a. Podcast on this episode, uh oh, sorry, on this topic so that, um, we, I can tailor the podcast to suit your needs. So that's it for me today, my friends, welcome back, giddy up, she's in that saddle again, and I could not be any more excited about it.
I will talk to you very, very soon. Much love everybody. Bye.
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